Went out for karaoke for a friend’s birthday this weekend. Been hummin’ this little number ever since.

I was sitting in the classroom of

a prestigious professor

who pointed around the room

at where former famous pupils sat.

My fellow students laughed and asked him questions.

I too was amused

but could not partake

as my mouth

was full

of brisket.

So I had this crazy dream last night. I feel like writing it up. A lot of it doesn’t make sense. Try to follow.

So my dream started with being part of an amateur astronomy group. We were looking at Mars through a telescope. I noticed that at the poles of mars there was a flashing light, which we attributed to magnetic something hitting the poles. As we zoomed in (our telescope had a pretty legit zoom) you could see that at the poles of mars there was a ton of crazy martian vegetation and woods and awesome stuff. So I had to go there.

So I got ready for the journey. I had to swim to Mars. I would need to be careful. If I missed I would float away into interstellar space forever. So I held my breath and jumped as hard as I could. I landed on Mars. I ran to the woods and rolled around in the awesome martian vegetation. There was no life on Mars, regarding animals, but plenty of crazy vines and trees. My favorite part was that there were massive piles of leaves that had been accumulating for millenia and I could jump in the piles and roll around and not be afraid of bugs because there were no bugs on Mars. It was awesome. There was some dry ice caked around, because it was winter, but I hardly noticed. The air was dry though. From Mars you could see Earth, and it was massive for some reason. And it had a huge equatorial ridge.

My next stop on my interstellar journey was this crazy new item in our solar system. Someone had launced a Nintendo Wii into outerspace a while ago. As it floated around our solar system, it accumulated rings of small ice crystals so that it eventually became a giant floating orb of small ice particles rotating around a Nintendo Wii. I jumped to it and played around in the ice for a while.

I continued swimming around the solar system. I made a stop at Saturn and pulled out my cell phone and called home. I told my friends how cool it was in outer space. I was having a great time. I was also really surprised with the cell phone service on Saturn.

I went back to Earth. Held massive news conferences in front of mankind and told them how cool Mars was. So everyone decided to swim to Mars and play in the martian forests. Everyone was so happy on Mars that they decided that we should just get rid of Earth and all the crap on it so we destroyed the Earth and it was spectacular and everyone rejoiced.

Then,  someone got thirsty. We realized that there was no water on Mars, just carbon dioxide and that these plants didn’t need water. Everyone got real scared and everyone was doomed.

The End

So I am dying to write a little about Army Ants but I want to make sure I do it right, so until then I will write a quick blurb about a dream I had last night.

I don’t remember quite what was going on, but I remember the outcome. I think I was chatting with someone … but what we were chatting about is irrelevant. At some part of our conversation, my dream returned an out of bounds enumeration which my brain didn’t have a condition for. This, for one reason or another, lead the subsequent dream function to enter an infinite for loop. My dream hung up for a few seconds before the debugger caught it and I woke up with a very sudden jolt. As metaphorical as that may seem, that’s actually how it played out in my head and what I remembered when I woke up.

I have been working on Army Ants literally all day every day, from wake up to bed. I get to school between 8 am and 10 am and leave around 10 pm or later and typically during that time I will be neglecting all of my classes except for Army Ants. Saturday and Sunday cannot escape the wrath of Army Ants.

I need a vacation.